There was a line and it had been crossed.
I wasn’t stupid. I knew how I looked, how I acted. I was his puppy dog, his whipping post, his girl Friday. I swooned around him, I knew I did that. For all my dedication and obedience I got a pat on the head, not even on the butt. I was sexless on his eyes, but at the same time he took advantage of my attraction to him. I was alright with that. In fact it made me work harder. I wasn’t doing it to win his heart or get a kiss. I served Mister McIntyre because I wanted to and it made me happy and he deserved it.
This was something else though, something new and of scared me more than all the secrets, all the waiting and all the frustration. My heart had given up racing. There was a new fear and it was slow and methodical.
He didn’t call me into his office for the rest of the day. He came back from lunch and as he opened his door I could see the little bit of pink on his desk.
He went to a meeting and had a drink with a client. When he came back he didn’t even look at be as he walked inside. His face was as irritable as ever. I was sitting like a death row inmate. The calm of inevitable doom had come over me.